8:55

I am so excited to say I ran a mile in 8 mins and 55 seconds!!

 

I'm super proud of myself!

 

I mean I only started running like 3ish weeks ago and now I am obsessed/crazed about running.

 

I can not believe how fast/far I have come. I mean 3 weeks ago I couldn't run a whole mile or if I did run the mile I WAS DYING at the end. Now I can run 5 miles and then I DIE. haha.

 

My goal today was to run under 10 mins. That was my goal. But then my song came on, you know that song that makes you push harder, that gives you just that extra little something something you need. That song for me for whatever reason (maybe cause its funny and upbeat) but its 50 ways to say goodbye by Train.

 

I LOVE that song and when it comes on I just want to RUN and fast and sing as loud as possible.

 

But after that song was over I had just a tiny bit left to run and Selena Gomez's Who Says came on and I pushed myself so much harder then Ive ever pushed myself before. And I finished at 855.

 

I started bawling my eyes out. Seriously. I was that girl on the treadmill in the middle of the gym crying. I couldn't help it. I haven't been able to run in years. I haven't felt such pride in myself in years. I was overwhelmed and to know that I had beat my goal by over a minute just made it that much more emotional. There were so many times I wanted to quit because it was hard. It hurt. My knees have been killing me, my ankle has been flaring up from when I broke it, I have the worst blisters I have ever had and as soon as I start running they burn. But I pushed through it all and I did it and then I cried. HAHA

 

After I got myself together. I texted the hubs and told him about my 855 and he called me right after. Why this is important is my husband is so busy, so over worked and doesn't even get a moment to spare to text/call me ever during the day. Heck he doesn't have time to eat or go to the bathroom all day. He's so incredibly busy. Like he goes to work at 3am and lately hasn't been coming home till between 8 and 11 at night. Crazy hours the last 2 weeks. So needless to say he hasn't returned any phone calls or text messages in almost 2 weeks until he's off of work.

 

But today I texted him in the middle of one of his work inspections and as soon as he saw my message he stepped out and called me. It meant the world to me. I had told him the night before that my plan was 10 mins and he wished me good luck and he fell asleep (haha). So when he called I was shocked I even said why are you calling me, haha, and he said he felt that this was that important that he needed to call me immediately and tell me how proud he was of me and how much he loved me. It made that moment so much more special.

 

So there you have it. Your body can do anything you tell it to. Mind over matter  =) I proved that today. With how much pain I was in, with how little running experience I have, if you put your mind to it (and maybe have good songs) you can do it too!!

 

Love Love Love

I love my babies so much (as if you didn't already know that)

They drive me up the wall sometimes and there are times where I just want to send them to Grandma's and maybe not pick them back up, but then there are those moments where your heart swells and you cant imagine life without them.

This morning was one of them. Chris had the morning off so we got to spend some time together and they were just being as sweet as could be and so very loving and I love moments like these and want to remember them for those moments when they are driving me insane.

We even took some pictures of this moment.

 

Love these little munchkins =)

Thanksgiving 2012

We had such a good Thanksgiving. It was so nice and relaxing and enjoyable.

 

 

It started Thursday morning with Cinnabon cinnamon rolls and eggs, its what we do every year for breakfast and every year after we eat such high sugary foods we all feel horrible for about an hour or so. We should change it next year but the cinnamon rolls are so yummy I think its that no one cares. lol

After breakfast we start prepping food and have the parade on in the background. The kids LOVED the parade.

We went outside and played some while food was cooking. It was actually a really nice day and playing outside was enjoyable.

Dinner was at 3 and we ate and ate and ate. Then we all laid on the couch with our super full bellies and watched The Santa Clause which is another family tradition.

Chris and I were lucky enough to have my mom offer to keep the kids so we could do black friday shopping. This was HUGE because Tenley sleeps only in her crib. She will not nap anywhere but her bed and she would certainly not sleep all night long without her bed. So my mom took a huge leap of faith and let Ten spend the night. We made sure to bring her blankets and her dolly, Izzy, hoping those would help.

So we put Ten down waited about 30 mins to make sure she fell asleep and then we left. I made an agreement with my mom that if she woke up to call me and I would go straight home so Chris and I took 2 cars just in case.

Chris and I made it to Walmart with 5 mins to spare before they let people start buying stuff and it was CRAZY! We went to get 2 games my mom wanted for my sister cause they were normally 50 and they were on sale for 25 and I wanted to get the kids a play kitchen. This play kitchen normally is over 100 bucks well they had it for 50 so of course I HAD to get it.

Then we went to target which was even crazier then walmart. The line literally wrapped around every single aisle of the whole entire store. So we left. Nothing was worth that line.

We ran to Sears and Toys R Us then to post to buy a new TV. Chris waited outside in the cold for 2 hours for this TV. I stayed in the car and slept. HAHA. They let them in early to wait since it was so cold outside around 2 am so I went and joined him inside. We got a 55in Sony Smart LED tv for 699. This is normally a 1600 dollar TV. It was on sale for 799 but if you got there early they had some coupons and we got a 100$ off coupon for the TV! It was so worth it then.

After that we went back to my moms house (5am) and I woke my mom up to go shopping and Chris stayed with the kids. I was very impressed that Ten had slept all night long =) Proud mama moment.

My mom and I had the best time shopping since it was DEAD out. Like seriously. We went to target, Kohl's, the mall, and had no lines and no problems with traffic or anything. It started getting busy around 10am. So we got 5 hours of crowd free shopping. I got the kids some gifts, some friends some gifts, I got Ten 6 cloth diapers for 30$!! Basically I feel like I scored. I LOVE Black Friday shopping. It is my favorite and even though by 2pm when I got home I was exhausted and even when the husband says lets go to lowes and then go to the farm and get a tree after I have been up for over 36 hours, I would do it all over again.

So to me it was a great Thanksgiving. The fact that I got to spend it with my family and the people I love makes it even better =)

 

The High Running Gives.

Running gives me the biggest HIGH EVER! I have never experienced the "runners high" that runners talk about all the time. But every day I have ran past 3 miles I have gotten it. It puts me in this urophic mood and nothing touches me. Nothing can upset me. Im so incredible happy after I run. I feel accomplished, I feel refreshed, I feel AMAZING.

I ran 3 miles tuesday and kinda was upset with myself for not pushing farther because I feel like I could have pushed farther. So the next day I pushed with everything I had and made it to 4.5 miles!! Woot! Every day since I have ran 4.5 miles. I pushed for 5 today but I have these huge blisters on my feet and they start to flair up around mile 4 and I keep pushing through it but it hurt so badly today I couldnt stand the pain. They are blistering so badly they are bleeding. Not quite sure how to stop this from happening or if I just need to keep dealing with it till it builds up over time.

But not even my bleeding feet take away from how I love running and how I feel amazing afterwards bleeding feet and all.

I signed up for my first ever 5k and I want to start working on my time. I want to run the 3k in just under 33 mins. Which is just under a 11 min mile. Yes thats slow but thats what Im running at now. So anything under 33 mins is awesome for me =)

So I have 19 days to get working on running faster and longer and stopping my feet from bleeding. lol.

Day 5 of clean eating.

So.... I was doing awesome until we made some oatmeal chocolate chip cookies and they were amazing and I couldn't stop eating them. HAHA. But other then that and the corn bread we made to go with dinner last night. I have done really well.

I have eaten tons of fruits, veggies and lean protein. My body is slowly responding and I'm feeling a million times better and have more energy.

I'm so glad I jumped back on the clean eating band wagon because I haven't felt this great in awhile. I'm obviously going to be eating lots of yummy food on Thursday but its just one day and then Friday I will get right back on track with my diet.

I'm so proud of myself for sticking to it. It is really hard to not eat processed meals. Cooking meals and only using fruit, veggies and protein is actually really hard. Ok not hard but its time consuming. It takes forever to make most of the meals. Not a big deal but I see why so many people stick with processed foods. Its just easier. But the benefit of eating clean is worth it to me and to my family =)

I am still at my "normal" weight. I haven't lost any more weight and that's fine. I really think my body like my current weight. But I really need to lose these last 25 pounds. So my body needs to get on board.

I think I would be more discouraged about not losing any weight if I didn't see results, if my pants didn't fit better, if my shirts weren't hanging on me, but you know what I SEE BIG results, my pants are HUGE on me and some of my shirts are so baggy. The other BIG change I see if my workouts.

When I started I couldn't run a mile, a few weeks ago I posted about how I ran my first 2 miler non stop. Well today I ran 3 miles non stop. Whats amazing is I could have kept running. I was feeling amazing! But I had set my goal to make it to 2 miles, then when I made it to 2 I said keep going lets see how far you can go and I went to 3 and then my mind played dirty little tricks on me and told me I couldn't do anymore so I stopped. I'm so proud of myself for pushing to 3 miles but then knowing that I could have done more I could have gone longer but my mind is still stuck back in time 3 months when I couldn't run at all and the idea of 3 miles seemed the longest run ever.

I need to get my mind to today and trust that I can run 3 miles, trust that I can even run farther then 3 miles. So tomorrow I am going back to the gym and seeing if I can run past 3 miles and how far past 3 miles I can go.

After realizing I could run 3 miles I went home and found the next 5k around my town and found one on Dec 15. Chris is going to run it with me and this will actually be my very first official race. I am super nervous but kinda excited to push myself and do it and get a good time.

So I kind of want to not focus on the number on the scale and focus on getting miles under my feet. Seeing how many miles I can run from yesterday to Dec 15 and just getting back to the girl I was in high school that LOVED running. I want to love running again. Today I got a slight taste of that love of running I use to have.

After running my 3 miles. All sweaty and yucky but so very proud of myself

And then of course one of the not so fun things about running. These awesome bumps are all over my legs from my shorts. My shorts were so large and my sweat just stayed in them and rubbed my whole legs raw. They hurt so bad. So I obviously need smaller shorts or some running capris.

A littlr bit of this and a little bit of that

I just wanted to do an update on life in pictures :)

Marcus had turkey day at school and we got to go eat with him. It was a blast :) 

Someone is in love with dadaddy's necklace, her milk and her dolly that she named IzzzzZzYyyy. That's code for Izzy. 

Ten turned 16 months old on Friday :)

They both wanted to hold my hand while waiting ar school.

Once we gave this little girl some celery she has had a much happier belly and has actually pooed!!

My first pair of new jeans since losing 24lbs!!!

Date night with my amazing husband 

Marcus and his new choo choos

Marcus and ten before christmas pics at school

So there you have it our littlr update on life this past week. I love weeks like this one. Fun, busy, happy, crazy, and just pretty awesome :) 

Day 3 of Eating clean

As I said in the title I am at day 3 of clean eating. Overall I've done amazing. I have stuck to my meals and not over eaten once and haven't mindless snacked. I did eat some pita chips yesterday and today and I still drink my coffee so its not completely clean. But like I told my husband you don't want to see me without my morning coffee. 

So day one was pretty easy. I was so determined I didn't care that I felt hungry. I ate what I was suppose to and didn't slip up once. My diet was this on day one. 

Breakfast egg whites with spinach, mushrooms, and tomatoes. 

Lunch salad with chicken, boiled egg, stanch, tomatoes and I used a very light grape based dressing. 

Dinner was another salad.

I snacked twice eating strawberry's, grapes and string cheese for protein. 

So super good for me anyways. 

I did break my promise of not stepping on the scale and jumped on the scale Saturday morning. I had lost 3lbs already though so I knew I was doing something right. 

I pretty much ate the same more salads, some turkey, sweet potatoes, green beans, and some fruits. 

I weighed myself again today (Sunday) and lost another 2lbs. So 5lbs in 2 days. Not bad. I know its just the water weight but I don't care. I needed it to go away so I could get my weight loss back on track and now I'm officially back to my current weight with a weight loss of 24lbs. I seriously need to hit this 25lb mark. I keep getting so close and miss it by .2lbs. Its crazy, its annoying, its frustrating. I really am hoping to wake up in the morning and see that I have officially lost 25lbs. We shall see. My goal with clean eating was to make it to 27lbs weight loss because that puts me at pre Tenley weight. That would be the best buy Thanksgiving present EVER!! 

Let's see what the scale has for me tomorrow. 

I seriously think someone needs to come take my scale away from me. I need scale intervention. I can't not weigh myself every day. Ugh. Maybe one day I'll have self control where the scale is concerned. 

Back on Track

I kinda wrote this 3 days ago and forgot to post so here's the post and I'm about to post an update on this :)

So I fell off the weight loss band wagon bad this past week, but just cause you mess up for a week doesn't mean you should quit all together. So I'm back on the band wagon and starting with eating clean. Gotta get all the (fabulous) yucky food outta my system. I ate clean for a week when I first started my weight loss journey and lost 5lbs the first week. There is just something about eating completely clean that does a body some good. After all the carabaras, outback, wine, candy, ice cream, Starbucks (count 7 in 2 days) and bread my body is freaking OUT! I mean why wouldn't it freak out. I'm holding onto tons of water weight from all the salt from all the bad food. My body hasn't had greasy food in months and has no clue how to procress the stuff anymore. So my body needs a good week or 2 of eating clean. I'm shooting for 5 days of eating clean and then we will see where to go from there. I say 5 days because Thanksgiving is next week and there is no way I'm passing on the yummyness of Thanksgiving.

I have a love hate relationship with eating clean. The first 2 days I feel like I'm starving and then everyday after that I feel AMAZING! So its getting past the first few days that is the HARDEST. But seeing the scale go up from water weight is the WORST thing in the world. So I don't care if I have to "starve" for the next 2 days I am sticking with my clean eating plan.

I got so wrapped up in all the yummy foods over the past month or so that I really stopped watching what I was eating and kind of went with the mind set of "Oh I will just work out and be fine". But that really doesn't work. I need to remind myself that this journey isn't only a couple month thing or a year thing. Its a forever thing and I will always be tempted by food and I need to find a way to have fun, eat and not over do it at the same time.

So my goal for this week is eat clean, don't cheat, lose the water weight, work out twice a day at least 3 times and not step on the scale until next Friday.

I have the worst habit of stepping on the scale every single morning. So my weight changes by ounces everyday. Its a habit I need to change. I need to weigh myself once a week and so from today till next Friday I will not weigh myself I will not even think about it. haha. Ok I will think about it every morning when I normally weigh myself but I think its whats best for me and my weight loss.

So there you have it. I failed with dieting and I'm here to change it =)
Here's a picture of the beginning of my clean eating. 

My Poor Tenley

As I mentioned in my last post, Tenley isn't sleeping, she is crying all day and pretty much all night. I am exhausted, she is exhausted, we are all exhausted. We are all so frustrated with the reason as to why she's not sleeping and it all leads back to her GI issues.

Last week the doctor prescribed her a lax and said give it 2-4 weeks and bring her back if its not working. Well its only been one week but it has turned her into a crying machine!

I researched online and it says that in babies it can take 24 hours to start working and in adults up to 48 hours to start working we are going on 168 hours and nothing is happening.

It should not be taking this long for her to have some relief. The lax is a high sugary mixture and so it makes her super hyper and then super grumpy and really upsets her tummy and makes her feel like she has to go potty but she cant.

I'm seriously at the end of my rope as to how to help her. I feel so helpless for this little baby who looks at me every time like please help me and I cant do a thing.

I understand her crying and not sleeping, I really do but it makes me so angry that I cant help her(not angry at her but just angry that she's going through this)! Like normally when your toddler wakes up you can figure out the problem and put them back to sleep, but with Ten we just have to hold her as she cries in pain. Its seriously the WORST thing in the world!

So today I am calling her doctor and will stalk their offices until they give her a referral to Duke to see a pediatric GI specialist who can figure out whats causing this.

Tenley is this sweet natured little girl, she is kind, and gentle and friendly and loving and she hardly ever use to cry. Now she's starting to be in almost constant pain and crying and so upset all the time. I feel so badly for her. I try to hold her and calm her down but most the time she cant sit with me because the pressure on her butt hurts her to much.

No 15 month old should have to suffer this much. So lets find out what the Doctors are gonna do because if they brush this off one more time.... its not gonna be pretty. I have been telling them since Ten's birth that something wasn't right with her poop and here we are 15 months later and its not getting any better like they said it would.

So pray, pray that the doctors will find it in their hearts to help her, pray that I don't go mad trying to get her help, and pray that my little ten will be able to heal and be that happy baby again.

What the Gym has done to me...

Ive always concerted myself a pretty level headed person, until I had children. Children have a way of bringing out the best in you and the worst in you. We've had a pretty rough couple of days and I have found that as long as I get to go to the Gym I am golden, if I don't get that hour and a half at the gym I kinda go crazy. I never thought the gym would turn into my place to escape. But every time I leave I feel better, I feel like I can be a better mommy after the gym cause all my frustrations are gone. I left them on the treadmill or in a class. Its like they seriously disappear.

I LOVE that I know if we are having a rough day that I just need to go to the gym and most the time everything is better afterwards.

Being a SAHM is HARD and when you are with your kiddos 24-7 (and yes I do mean that cause Ten isn't sleeping at night) it is exhausting and stressful and hard.

I know it might sound wrong to say I need to get away from them. But it really is whats best for mommy and babies. They need a break from us mommies and us mommies need a break from them.

Don't get me wrong I LOVE my babes, but I LOVE my gym time too.

Since we are on the topic of going to the gym. I think my body is at a stall. I think it's like you've lost 25 pounds you can be done. I'm not losing anything more. I have been at the same weight for weeks.

It might be a mental thing. I am so happy and proud of my progress and happy to be 3 jean sizes smaller, but I haven't been pushing myself as hard, I haven't been eating as well as I could be. I really think I'm (kinda) happy with how I look, but I'm not happy with the number. So over the next few month I really need to dig deep and find that inner strength to be able to lose these last 25 pounds.

I know I can do it its just doing it.

We are going to Florida in December to see my Hubby's family and surprising Marcus with going to Mickey's Very Merry Christmas Party at the magic Kingdom and by then I want to be at least 10 pounds lighter and I know that's crazy considering we are about to enter Thanksgiving and that's all about eating tons of yummy food. But I don't want to look back at these wonderful memories we are going to have and think wow I was fat.

So here's to a small goal that I want to accomplish in 5 weeks. That's 2lbs a week. 

A little bit of this and a little bit of that

There is so much going on I'm gonna make categories: Weight loss/Working out, Tenley and her Doc visit, and Signing. There is also pumpkin carving and Halloween, but those might need there own post.

 

So Weight Loss/Working out

 

Its going so well! I never thought I would get to a point where I loved my weight loss journey. Of course I love losing weight. But the dieting and working out part. Kinda sucked. I now know what my body needs to lose weight, I know how much I need to workout, how often, how long. I feel like I got the hang of it. I know that I will plateau and I will have to change a few things up but overall its getting easier. I'm not losing weight as fast and that's not fun. But the smaller you get the harder it is to lose weight. I'm not saying all this to make people think I got the hang of this and I don't need help or I know all. Its just when I first started it was so hard. I didn't know what to do or where to start or what I needed. But now I know and it makes a huge difference. But also with knowledge comes headaches. With knowing what I need to do. I find myself slacking at times. Not pushing myself to find out where I need to be. So I really need to dig deep and keep trying to push myself. Even if its not for my weight loss. I just want to know how far I can push myself mentally and physically. So this weekend my goal is to push and run 3 miles. I ran 2 miles 2 weeks ago in 25 mins. So My goal is 3 miles in 35 mins. We shall see if I can do it. I want to push myself, I want to see how much stronger I am. I have lost 24 pounds. I want to see what my body can do with 24 pounds off of it. I will report back Monday =)

Here's a picture of what 24 pounds looks like. So not happy with where I started but so glad with where I am at the half way mark.

 

 

 

 

Moving onto Tenley's Doc Appt

 

Today she had her 15 month check up and it went SOO well! Ten's normal doctor was sick so we had a new doctor see her and I LOVE him. A little back story here. We hate (okay maybe hate is too strong of a word but dislike) her doctor. She is always running behind, she spends 2 seconds with us and never listens to our concerns, she told me when I brought Marcus in for his speech that the reason he was behind in speech was because I taught him sign language and so that made him bilingual!! At Ten's 4 month appt she asked me if I was breastfeeding or formula feeding and I was so proud of myself for only BF and i proudly said BFing and she responds with "Ohhh..... you know BF doesn't give your baby all the benefits she needs right?" I was so mad!! So needless to say we have had a ton of problems with their doctor. Well when this new doctor came in and started asking questions and I told him all about Ten's GI issues he got so upset at our other doctor. Because she just put in a referral to see a GI specialist and have a colonoscopy done. We have been in many times for her GI issues and she has never done anything but refer us to a GI Spec. So he doesn't want her to go through something so traumatic at such a young age without trying antibiotics laxatives first. I'm so greatful that someone finally is listening to me. I feel like I have to be Tenleys voice and no one would listen. I have fought tooth and nail since she was 2 months old for someone to help her and finally at her 15 month appt someone does. I will forever be grateful to this doctor for giving my daughter a chance to not have to go through something so traumatic as a colonoscopy. Here's a few pics of her today =)

Before the Doctors Appt.

 

After the Appt. All pooped out because of shots.

 

So I was going to talk about signing but this is already a long post. I'll save it for a different day =)